a new weight-loss gadget called the AspireAssist Aspiration Therapy System. It works like this: users stuff themselves silly with whatever food they want, then, 20 minutes later, they pump their own stomachs (!!!!) before the calories absorb, thereby losing weight...the AspireAssist is the pet project of a King of Prussia-based company called Aspire Bariatrics, which is currently seeking U.S. patent for the contraption. The device was actually invented by Segway creator Dean Kamen